Feels Like Home (pt. 3); #30Layers30Days Challenge Day 24


What do you want to change about the world? What cause or need tugs at your heartstrings the most?


Michael had always been an introvert I understood.

Intensely intuitive, often tormented by his ability to feel the pain in the world. Acutely aware of it due to his travels. Unable to find a quiet from the constant noise. Functioning at a constant state of burnout. Alone among millions. Out of place in his own home.

His death felt intensely personal to me because it reignited a fear I have had since childhood-that I will never rise above the noise and find a balance. That I would never find a place to “be”. That my place is somehow not here.

But like Michael I have always found a safe space with children. Specifically, children who feel as out of place as I do. He often surrounded himself with orphans, or child-stars weighed down by the weight of being their family’s sole support. He found joy in giving them a place where they weren’t alone or unique. And this is where my heart lies.

While others coo over newborns, I’m usually in the corner with the new middle child helping them adjust. I have always had a place in my heart for children in the system and hope to adopt an older child, or at least be able to mentor a few from youth through adolescence. I took great joy in my work speaking with and coaching through the pageant system and consider being a part of their story one of the accomplishments I can take to my old age. I can’t even write this out without getting emotional about it. But making the difference in one child’s life somehow makes the big world and all its ills manageable.

Conceived by GG Rene of AllTheManyLayers.com, the #30Layers30Days Challenge dares writers to dig deep with thoughtful daily inspirations meant to promote introspective thought and mindful journal practice. I will be posting my more inspired entries from the daily challenges. You can follow the #30Layers30Days hashtag on Twitter and Instagram, or follow GG Rene at @ggrenewrites.


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